eyebags are the trend.

when i was young,
i use to ask myself, how much time do i have..
my answer will be, FOREVER, infact a LIFE-TIME..
then when i grew older,
i ask myself again, how much time do i have..
i told myself, ALOT, but definitely not a LIFE-TIME..
i still have ALOT of time to waste..
take my time..
and now..
i ask myself this question again..
wendy, how much time do you have..
i think for awhile, and i told myself,
not much..infact, no more time..

all the while, i have been living my life carefreely,
living comfortably under my lovely parent's protection..
life has been easy for me, i just eat and sleep..
i was well protected, i wasn't hurt..
until i step into secondary school, i realise life isn't that easy..
infact it's VERY hard..
i knew good and bad friends, infact some fake as well..
stabbing you hard on your back and you don't even realise..
until you feel the pain, it's all too late..
i'm definitely a good example..thou i'm sure there's some worst example than mine..
but mine, to me is enough..

for a person who had never got hurt before..
once is enough..
but i had more than once..
people stabbing you again and again..
and me believing them again and again..
when you're in trouble, then turn their back on you..
leaving you alone..

but i could be consider lucky already..
i had someone who ONCE love me wholeheartedly..
i was happy, fortunate and for once, in my 4 years i felt happy,
from the bottom of my heart..
i don't have to care about anything..
cause i know however miserable i am in school,
i still have someone who'll stand beside me..
someone not very good in words..but definitely a person who cares..
but soon left as well..
what is not mine, will not be mine..

but i know things will NEVER stay the same FOREVER..
it's a naive thinking if it'll stay the same all the while..
but i'm sure there's some who really stay like this FOREVER..
i can only say they're super lucky..

this 4 years wasn't easy for me..
infact..VERY difficult..
many *xiao ren* backstabbing and hurting me behind my back..
my life's SUPER miserable and hard to live through..
the happy moment soon pass...
i alsways put up a happy front infront of everyone..
but just how many know i'm actually not..
i guess none..
maybe one..he know's me best..

no one know how unhappy i am..
how miserable i feel..
i'm sure i'm not the only one who feels like this..
no one understand how i feel when i'm in school..

since young, i never thought that i will regret anything for my whole life..
but now, i had 2 regrets, BIG REGRET..
entering this school is my super big regret...
making friends that stab you from behind, bad-mouthing you..
and not knowing how to grab hold of my HAPPYNESS is my second regret..
i always think of other before myself, that's why i'm not happy..
i let go because i don't want to make both party unhappy..
i thought this might make him happy, perhaps i'm a burden to him..
but i forgot to think for myself..
i guess that's the last time i'm going to think for others and not myself..

i want to be happy..
i want to pursuit my own happiness,
i want to be trouble-free,
i want to be carefree,
i want to leave this current hell i'm in,
i want to forget,
forget him, forget those backstabber, forget all the unhappy stuff that happens here,
i'm glad atleast i have a few good friend that really care..
always there for me,
thanks zi, jy, jag =)

i don't want to be negative anymore,
if i could turn back time,
i would be happy, smile like i use to be in the past.

ciaos.